Pain Points

 A theme repeated in many of the books I read and podcasts I listen to centres on the idea of pain being a motivator for change.  Often it is pain that tends to be the final straw that pushes us to venture out of our comfort zone, or out of a typical pattern of being, toward a new direction.  While I agree and can think of many moments in my life where this has been the case, I can also identify moments where pain was not enough.

I believe that we are hard-wired to avoid pain at all costs.  This serves us well as it often means that we do not put ourselves into situations that may have negative outcomes, potentially extending our lifespan.  But it also can result in a narrowing of our life experience as we seek comfort and status quo over new experiences with unknown outcomes.  In our quest to stay safe, what are we missing out on and how are those missed moments ultimately impacting our life's direction?  I know that in my life, had I not made choices that led to uncomfortable moments I would have missed out on so many of the rich experiences and opportunities for growth that have made me the person I am today.  It is easy to look back now and romanticize those moments of discomfort and pain, which takes away from the work that was involved in sitting with the discomfort.  It is not easy to be in a place where you are a beginner who is struggling to internalize a new skill or piece of knowledge.  Remembering both the struggle and the feeling of success is crucial for future growth, as we need to be able to offset that feeling of despair with the sensation of accomplishment that will come in time.

Another approach to pain that I relate to is a tendency to ignore it.  I can think back to many moments when I felt physical pain during training and made the decision to push through instead of stopping to notice and listen to the messages it was sending me.  All too often this led to injuries that forced me to stop, take notice, and sit with the pain.  Sadly, this was not a one-time occurrence.  I have endured repeated injuries through a similar pattern of behaviour.  And why would I allow myself to encounter this more than once?  The simple fact that I was equating pain with weakness; and pushing through pain seemed to be a way of demonstrating grit, determination, and strength.  I could not have been more wrong.  This type of pain can also manifest on an emotional or spiritual level, as we force ourselves to push through or accept painful situations in our lives for fear of seeming weak if we hold out our hands and ask for help.  This too has been a pattern that I am learning to change.  

What would happen if we changed our outlook on pain points?  What if we looked at these moments in time as valuable opportunities for change or insight?  What if we turned our pain points into teachers instead of detractors?  Would we be able to open ourselves up to new ways of thinking and potential chances for growth?  Could we learn to embrace these times as important signposts on our journey and allow them a chance to provide direction for our next steps?  I am finding myself in a place where I am feeling pain points and instead of trying to ignore or avoid them, I am looking for ways to open myself up to the messages that they are sending.  Not all of the information I am receiving is what I want to hear, but deep down I know it is important to acknowledge and observe.  Thinking back to the past lessons I have learned through pain is allowing me to feel less afraid of it and more empowered by it, as I know that pain is often a precursor to changes that bring relief.  I just need to get out of the way and allow the process to take place.