Kerri On Down The Road

 As Pride Month comes to a close, I find myself thinking back to where I was a year ago and how much of a difference that year has made. Coming out to myself two days before the beginning of Pride was timely, and yet confusing.  I felt a sense of relief and joy at discovering my truth, and also a bigger feeling of "now what?" as I looked at the rainbow flags that began to appear in windows and on front porches in my neighbourhood.  I had self- identified as gay, but was I really and truly gay and was I gay enough to wrap myself in those rainbow flags and join the community?  I quickly realized that I had very few ties to the community and with COVID limiting the ability to really be a part of any groups, I needed to find another way to locate my tribe.  Thank goodness for Google and for MeetUp.  I literally typed "women coming out" into a search engine and was linked up with a Women's Coming Out MeetUp Group run out of the 519 Community Centre.  Game c...

 I went for a walk the other day, deciding to not bring anything to listen to.  I wanted to be present with my thoughts and ruminate a bit on some ideas I had been processing.  As I fell into a nice rhythm of strides I found my mind doing its thing, swirling and pulling apart the threads of things that were on my mind.  Those who know me well will also nod in agreement when I say that I tend to be a "planner" putting together the blueprints of next steps and the ones after those almost immediately when faced with a goal or issue.  When this is pointed out to me, I usually laugh it off and say "Virgo" as if my birth sign is the only reason I need to give, and then get right back into planning mode.  This character trait has served me very well in my life, as it has allowed me to become laser focused on goals I want to achieve or skills I want to gain, and has also come in pretty handy when helping others to streamline their processes at work or map out how t...

I was on the bike trainer this morning when I had an epiphany - I Can Be Patient.  Now, for anyone who has ever had the joy of riding on a bike trainer, or a running on a treadmill or using any type of stationary cardio fitness equipment, patience seems to be a requirement just to complete a workout.  So what was this radical discovery all about?  As I have been making my way back towards my fitness levels pre-COVID I have needed to take down my intensity on the workouts.  I had done so today and as my mind started to wander during my session I found myself starting to think ahead and plan out how long it might be before I was back at 100% intensity for the workouts.  I caught myself in this thinking pattern and stopped and that is when I realized that I can be patient about this, and for the first time in my life I knew that I meant it.  Patience and Kerri have not tended to go hand in hand through the years.  There are a number of places in my life w...

 This morning in the shower, I did something that I have not done in a long time.  I took my exfoliating gloves, opened a tube of lovely shower gel and proceeded to give my body a good rubdown.  This may not seem like something to write a blog about; stick with me you will soon see why I am writing this down. As I massaged myself I had a few different thoughts starting to swirl around in my head..."this feels great, why don't I do this more often?"  "I needed this!"  "I love my body".  Whoa - what was that last one?!?  Instead of laughing it away or pushing it away or replacing it with something negative and more "realistic" I let that feeling flow.  And as it did I realized that I actually do love my body.  I have never felt that way before and am sure that this is something that will change with time, but in that moment it was absolutely true.  Where did this come from and how can I cultivate it to stay longer and not go away? Nourishm...