Amor Fati

I have often been caught up by binary thinking.  Things were one way or the other, and that was that.  I had little ability to discern events in my life as anything other than good or bad, and with that came a sense of elation at good fortune, or dismay at injustice being served.  

Then I was introduced to a new way of seeing things.  "Amor Fati" is the philosophy of seeing events in one's life as neither good nor bad, but as necessary or required steps in the bigger journey.  A similar sentiment was shared on a podcast that caught my attention - "this is the curriculum".  The context for that idea is that we are all here to learn, and when faced with what we may perceive to be difficult seasons in our lives, we can choose to see these as the lessons set out for us to learn.  

Neither of these ideas may help in the middle of a crisis, or when facing heartbreak or what seems like insurmountable obstacles.  I fully understand and agree.  It may only be once we have time to reflect that these alternative perspectives bring clarity.

Amor fati is a Latin phrase that translates as "love of fate".  Love may feel like a strong word to use when considering our fate and the ups and downs we encounter in life.   In my mind, the idea of embracing fate feels comforting as opposed to fighting the aspects of life that do not go my way.  The energy I have spent over the years piling anguish and angst on top of disappointment is something that I can never recoup.  Energy I can now see would have been better utilized in finding ways to work with what I have been given.  It is not easy to learn to bend and move with forces we cannot control, yet that is exactly what we need to do in times of turmoil.  Watching trees during windstorms provides a clear example of how to do just that with stiff and brittle branches being shed because they can no longer flex and allow give.  I no longer want to feel like one of those limbs whose lost suppleness will ultimately become its demise.  I would rather be rocked in the moment knowing I can bend instead of breaking.

So instead of walking through life trying to sort out the hows and whys behind everything that happens, I will work towards building in pauses to absorb and accept.  Accept what is and absorb the learning that is being bestowed.  And maybe through this practice, I will find a greater sense of peace that comes with letting go of the need to know all of the answers. 




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