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Showing posts from August, 2019

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

It's funny how quickly you can become accustomed to change and to a certain pace of change.  When I look at the past six months of my life and if I really stop and think about all that has taken place, events that I have had control over and those which I have not, it is pretty amazing and honestly a little overwhelming.  Being in the middle of all of this change and movement, growth and exploration, it is easy to lose sight of how much work has taken place and the pace at which these changes have occurred.  By losing perspective around that, I feel like I've simply become accustomed to this fast pace of change and development, and have almost become addicted to it.  To the feeling of movement and coming into myself after so long without that direction or sense of self.  Finally seeing and more importantly accepting myself has truly been something I never really put much thought towards before, and now that I've started I almost feel like a day without some sort...

Feed Yourself

As the days and weeks progress, I have started to make better decisions around self care when it comes to physical activity.  I am finally realizing that all too often I had been pushing myself, always striving to do more with less, thinking that it was some type of achievement to do so much while running on empty.  What I now know is that I am stronger and perform much better when I am properly fueled and rested, and there is a reason behind what I am doing.  Not activity for the sake of always being on the go and being busy.  Activity because it is a part of a greater plan, or because it brings happiness or is going to serve me and my body in some other way.  All too often I used being busy to escape feelings that I didn't want to experience.  Instead of numbing through alcohol, drugs or other vices, I chose the "healthy" option of always being active.  And as a result of this practice, I suffered repetitive injuries and ongoing exhaustion.  I ...

Noticing versus Focusing

The other day, I was being coached by a dear friend when she asked a question that really resonated with me.  She asked me what I had been noticing about the situation that we were discussing.  Noticing....that word, the sentiment really stuck with me. After the call I was still thinking about it.  About how it feels like a more gentle, active and mindful way of taking in what is happening now in your life.  I felt like noticing allowed me to see more of what was happening, to use a wider lens to look through.  And then I started to think about what I typically do in my life, and that would be focus.  I have been a person who could be described as very focused and driven.  When I set my sights on a goal or decide on a direction to move towards, look out!  It is usually full steam ahead, target locked on and there's no stopping until the task has been accomplished.  A great method of achieving goals, there's no denying that.  What I sta...

What is Coincidence, Anyways?

The other day I experienced something that I at first could only describe as a crazy coincidence.  I ended up running into someone on a streetcar out of the blue, whose path I never would normally cross, unless I purposely made it happen.  And it was someone who I absolutely wanted to see, and had been thinking of, but had I knew I needed to give some space. The circumstances around this were all just too random, too out of my control and probably could never be duplicated, even if I tried to.  I never usually take the streetcar home, and was daydreaming instead of getting off at the stop that I had planned to.  And as a result, our paths crossed. Which got me wondering, what IS coincidence?  Does it exist or does everything happen for a reason, and with a purpose?  Do we tell ourselves that these occurrences are just coincidences to make sense of life? And are we best to let things flow as they will, believing that the Universe has a plan and these "coinc...