Kerri On Down The Road

 Ugh -- "good enough".  Even as I type that I can't help but inwardly cringe.  For as long as I can remember, good enough was never good enough.  In my eyes, if I hadn't achieved perfection or something close to that standard, then I hadn't done the work and as a result had failed.  Reflecting back on this, I can picture so many moments in my life where I shortchanged myself because of this belief - not giving myself the opportunity to enjoy or celebrate success, even if it didn't look quite the way I had hoped it would.  And while managing to exceed expectations feels amazing, it is important to remember that it is more of an elusive experience than we might care to admit, and instead focus on the effort and accomplishments that we are seeing unfold regardless of how they stack up to our loftier wishes. The perfectionist/people-pleasing part of myself absolutely rebels at the idea of accepting my best effort as good enough.  It feels like I am taking ...

When you think of the word unravel, what images and emotions come forward?  In my mind, I picture a beloved sweater being snagged on a sharp object and doomed to fray and eventually disintegrate.  Accompanied by this image are feelings of deep regret, loss, and dismay.   These same emotions have often been present when I have felt aspects of my life coming apart at the seams, and I have felt helpless to intervene or stop the process. Only recently has my mind changed about the idea of unraveling and the positive power that this phenomenon can have in our lives and personal growth.  The shift took place when I learned what the word ravel means.  It is an interesting word with two contradictory definitions -- ravel can mean both the act of disentangling or tangling of loose threads or strands.  Something that is raveled could be either tightly wound or undone -- when something becomes unraveled it is unwound or loosened up.  Thinking more about my p...

Have you ever listened to how you describe yourself to others - the words you use, the phrases, and the descriptors.  One day, I caught myself repeating a very tired narrative that I realized was inaccurate and decided to start paying closer attention.  Each time I found myself starting down that worn-out path of self-limiting, and often self-depreciating language, I stopped and started again, despite feeling awkward and sometimes uncomfortable using new, more positive phrases to paint a picture of who I am. I wonder how many opportunities I have allowed to pass me by simply by convincing myself that "I am not the kind of person that can do _____".  This is not to say that I have a shortage of activities and adventures under my belt, nor do I feel like I have missed out on living a pretty big life.  What it makes me realize is how powerful the spoken word can be, and how we can use this power either to our benefit or deficit.  We not only communicate these ideas...

 As we roll into the first full week of 2025, some may feel the need to discard the year that has just passed. So often, a new year is rung in amidst chants of "New year, new me!" and other similar proclamations, which seem to encourage the purposeful forgetting of all that has taken place in the previous 365 days.  What a waste that would be!  Imagine planting seeds in the early spring and instead of continuing to tend to them as the months pass by, simply ignoring or tilling them under just as they begin to show signs of green shoots poking through the soil. I feel like we are programmed and encouraged to always be on the quest for newness - especially when the calendar turns from December to January.  After all, the start of a new project or early stages of commitment to a goal is often the most exciting part of the journey.  We get ourselves geared up to try something new, perhaps reaching outside of our comfort zone and into that space of unknown outcomes....

 I received a notification in my inbox the other day that helped me set an intention for the new year.  It was from the Waking Up app, and simply stated:     "The chief prevention against getting old is to remain astonished"  Kevin Kelly I found it to be both simple and beautiful in its simplicity, offering a potent reminder of how easy it can be to incorporate wonder into our days.  Astonishment can feel like a big, dramatic word to describe only the most unique or unexpected experiences that life has to offer.  Perhaps that is why we don't hear it included in conversations more often.  Much like the good china or best crystal we store away for that one day when it is appropriate to enjoy, astonishment feels like the emotion or experience we would rather hold onto for a truly extraordinary happening.   But what would happen if we allowed ourselves to enjoy smaller, everyday experiences on a grander scale?  What if we acted more lik...

This past year has been one of transition and shifting perspectives, of welcoming in changes both big and small and being open to where these new and undiscovered paths may lead.  This is not to say that all of these changes have come easily; many moments of doubt, second-guessing, and fear have accompanied many of the uncertain steps I have taken.  One of the biggest shifts that has taken place in my life has been my relationship to being in nature and becoming an observer of the world. January 28, 2024, was a turning point for me, marking my first foray into the frigid waters of Lake Ontario.  With those first steps into the water came a newfound appreciation and realization of the vastness of the world outside my door that I had been hastily ignoring and passing over in my day-to-day whirl of life.  Coming to the lake with my community of fellow cold dippers brought me back to a space of wonder and humbled me on more than one occasion.  Witnessing first-hand ...

My therapist once told me, "Life does not need to be a make-work project." I remember hearing those words and feeling a bit surprised. Really? If that is the case, why am I feeling so compelled to read book after book dedicated to self-help? Aren't I investing in my well-being by submerging myself deep in the waters of self-discovery? And what if I miss something by not reading these books, listening to these podcasts, and following these gurus? In my social psychology course, we learned that humans want to find the causes of happenings in our world.  We look for the reasons behind our behaviour, and the behaviour of others, desperate to unravel the meaning behind the whys.  I can attest to this tendency, as I have often found myself caught in a swirl of questions and assumptions when life has thrown me a curve ball.  Inevitably, this exercise has led to exhaustion and frustration because more often than not, there is no clear-cut answer to the question that we are asking...