Marathon Reflections....Staying True to Focus

Today's post is really a reflection on last weekend, and the learning that came from it.  After several months of training, dedication and planning, I ran my second marathon in as many years.  The marathon was always something that I aspired to.  Seeing others complete that feat was something that struck me with a sense of awe quickly followed by a sense of "I could never do that!"  I remember training for my first half-marathon and the feeling of accomplishment that came with achieving that milestone.  And still the marathon lurked in the distance, remaining a bit out of reach and seeming unattainable.  As time passed, more training and more races took place, the marathon suddenly seemed a little less daunting...not easy to be sure, but moved to a "Maybe one day...." in my mind.

Last year, while training for a half, I was feeling strong and decided that if I ran the race and felt good and came out without injury or issue I would go for it and would start to ramp up for the full distance. That race checked all of the boxes for me, and as I had my finisher medal placed around my neck, I knew the next one I collected would be for the full marathon.  I did the work and reaped the reward of completing the race.  I absolutely did have moments of struggle and doubt but came through it all to finish and feel great about the achievement.

My race plans for 2019 were somewhat modified due to a couple of injuries that sidelined me from running for the first quarter of the year.  The benefit of that was to discover cross-training at the Y and incorporating that into my overall fitness regime, resulting in what I felt would be a stronger base overall.  When I think back on my goals for the race this year, my primary one was to run a race where I finished strong and without injury.  My training plan reflected that outcome and I took care to be aware of my body's needs and ensured that I incorporated self care and maintenance the whole way through - pre-hab in the form of stretching, rolling, use of a lacrosse ball on tight muscles, massage, and chiropractic care along with pilates, yoga, swimming and anything else I felt would help to balance things off.  

I felt my strength increasing as the weeks ticked by and I as the race approached I started to zone in on goals - all time-related and based on comparisons to last year's race.  I felt so much stronger and ready for this year's event that I felt like I would blow the doors off of last year for sure.

The race went according to plan - great day, beautiful weather and familiar territory all resulted in a strong and steady race and my second marathon completed......at almost 10 minutes SLOWER than last year's pace!!!  Wait, WHAT?!?  How did that happen?  What happened to my new-found strength?  Was it all in my head?  

And so began the reflection, introspection and questioning of ability.  Sadly I will admit, the act of completing a marathon was somewhat lost to me at first, as I focused on the late-game goals I had placed on myself.  I thought back to the run itself and I absolutely did feel that my legs were working against me at times, that I was needing to work really hard to get them to go, meanwhile on my training runs I had felt so much more free and able to move easily.  So what gives???

I can tell you what I have discovered and what I will carry forward with me to future races.  The race I ran on Sunday was the exact one I had trained for - strong and steady.  I didn't go into this season looking for time and working on speed at all - in fact, the only "tempo" running I did happened by chance and infrequently.  What I did focus on was finishing strong, and I did accomplish that goal.  By changing my focus at the last minute and putting those time goals on myself what I did was basically try to force an outcome that was never really meant to be this year.  Had I stayed true to my original focus I am sure that the push back I felt would have been much more muted or may have not even been there at all.  And the day spent feeling disappointed would have also not been there.

Lesson learned?  Remember your focus and stay true to that.  There will always be bright shiny objects that come along and aim to distract you, and that is okay, provided that you are able to stay present with who you are and what you truly aim to accomplish.  Complete the goals that you set out to accomplish and then evaluate and determine the next course of action.  Much easier said than done, to be sure, and also much more satisfying to know that you can cross off one and move to the next with certainty that you are growing with every step you take.