Out With The Old, In With The New
Part of my role at work is to conduct pre-screen interviews for new hire candidates. One of my favourite questions to ask is "What is something you used to believe and no longer do?" It is meant to show if a candidate is able to easily change a set way of thinking, or mindset, and to what degree that type of change has taken place in their lives. I have often wondered what my response would be if asked that same question, and have realized that I do have an answer which has really come to light for me in over the past few weeks.
I used to believe that setting boundaries and limits in your life was a sign of weakness or quitting. I now realize that it is actually the complete opposite. The strength it takes to understand, accept and acknowledge that you need boundaries and then to establish and respect them is very underrated. I have always been someone who took pride in being busy, always on the go, cramming days with more than I could honestly accomplish and enjoying the reaction I would receive from others as they listened to my to-do list for the day or week. It felt good to be that person who was perceived to be an overachiever, always going, doing, being. No rest days, those are for weak people. If you can't keep up, try harder. As you read this understand that no one put those pressures on me, they came from within.
As the end of the year draws near, and I have taken some time to reflect on 2019, I have started to realize the errors of those ways. And can see how pushing like that is really a form of self-sabotage, as at some point things have got to give. And that will come in the form of an injury, illness or exhaustion. And none of those are going to lead you to where you are trying so hard to end up. This year especially as I experienced all three side-effects, I can clearly see how slowing down, allowing for rest and listening to what you truly need are crucial parts of any successful plan.
I have felt my schedule nearing capacity and realized that some changes would need to happen so I could not only rebalance but find balance again. In turn I have had to do something that I never have before....I have had to admit that I can't do it all....and no matter how many times I say it, it never gets easier to admit. Once I did acknowledge that, and sat with it for a bit, I realized that I also didn't want to do it all...I actually was looking forward to some down time, some space in my days that were unclaimed and undefined. Then it started to feel good. I felt sense of ease creep in and then understanding, and this is something I have needed for a long time now.
So although I am not a person who starts a new year armed with resolutions, one thing I do resolve to do is maintain this open-minded stance on rest and self-care. Ensuring the balance between doing and being remains in a healthy state. I am truly looking forward to embracing the coming year with open arms and an open heart and can't wait to see what lies ahead.
I used to believe that setting boundaries and limits in your life was a sign of weakness or quitting. I now realize that it is actually the complete opposite. The strength it takes to understand, accept and acknowledge that you need boundaries and then to establish and respect them is very underrated. I have always been someone who took pride in being busy, always on the go, cramming days with more than I could honestly accomplish and enjoying the reaction I would receive from others as they listened to my to-do list for the day or week. It felt good to be that person who was perceived to be an overachiever, always going, doing, being. No rest days, those are for weak people. If you can't keep up, try harder. As you read this understand that no one put those pressures on me, they came from within.
As the end of the year draws near, and I have taken some time to reflect on 2019, I have started to realize the errors of those ways. And can see how pushing like that is really a form of self-sabotage, as at some point things have got to give. And that will come in the form of an injury, illness or exhaustion. And none of those are going to lead you to where you are trying so hard to end up. This year especially as I experienced all three side-effects, I can clearly see how slowing down, allowing for rest and listening to what you truly need are crucial parts of any successful plan.
I have felt my schedule nearing capacity and realized that some changes would need to happen so I could not only rebalance but find balance again. In turn I have had to do something that I never have before....I have had to admit that I can't do it all....and no matter how many times I say it, it never gets easier to admit. Once I did acknowledge that, and sat with it for a bit, I realized that I also didn't want to do it all...I actually was looking forward to some down time, some space in my days that were unclaimed and undefined. Then it started to feel good. I felt sense of ease creep in and then understanding, and this is something I have needed for a long time now.
So although I am not a person who starts a new year armed with resolutions, one thing I do resolve to do is maintain this open-minded stance on rest and self-care. Ensuring the balance between doing and being remains in a healthy state. I am truly looking forward to embracing the coming year with open arms and an open heart and can't wait to see what lies ahead.
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