On Learning How to Be Yourself

How many times have you seen the slogan "Be Yourself"....I feel like it is everywhere.  Yet when I really think about it, I realize that I have never really been able to be myself as I truly did not know who that person was. I thought I did, and many times think that I came close to really seeing and acknowledging her.  But there was always a lens or layer put on top that suited the situation or perceived expectations that I felt others had for me.  In my personal and professional life this tendency to be the version of myself that I felt was expected or desired has always been there.  And being unsure and unaware of who I really am caused me to continue on with this exhausting pursuit of someone else's ideal version of me.
I am feeling such a sense of release and relief lately as I am finally shedding these layers, expectations and beliefs.  I am finally looking at the real me, embracing all of the quirks, strengths and weaknesses, the good the bad and the ugly, and celebrating it.  Because all of those parts, even the ones that I am not necessarily in love with make me who I am.  And I am falling in love with that person, finally, after 48 long years of fighting it.  This is not to say that I think I am suddenly perfect and my journey and work are complete so I can sit back, feet up and just let life happen.  Hell no.  What this means is that now the really good work begins.  Because I am approaching it from a new angle, with fresh eyes and renewed energy as I am no longer trying to be someone that I am not.  I am able to approach my journey from a place of feeling authentic and truly just being me. 
I feel like a huge part of this discovery and growth has come hand in hand with the shift in my life towards those who also see me for who I really am and are able to appreciate and genuinely support me.  There are no unreal expectations, no judgements, and no need to break me down to build them up.  Successes are celebrated, challenges are discussed in an open and optimistic way so as to grow and find solutions as opposed to encouraging negative mindsets and defeat.  There are no "told you so's" Instead there is open mindedness, and an honest, and genuine and selfless love....the kind that truly does allow you to celebrate the joy in someone's life without jealousy or resentment. 
Being able to show the world who you are is a gift and one that I do not take lightly.  I feel very grateful for everyone in my life who has provided me with this safe place and gave me the time I needed to shed those layers that I have been carrying around for so long.  It feels good to finally be able to be myself and not be afraid to do so. 

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