Paddle Boarding and Presence

 I have recently started to go out for a weekly stand-up paddle board session, usually at sunrise on Monday mornings.  This was something that appealed to me for many reasons - something new to try, a very peaceful way to start a week and also why not?  I feel more comfortable in and around the water than I ever have and also knew I would have a life jacket on, so really other than getting wet, the risks are relatively low.

This past week our morning session was cancelled and instead I went with my sons on a weekday night.  My eldest paddled with me and my youngest hung out on the beach waiting for post-activity treats.  Despite my enjoyment of paddling, I do find that I get a bit nervous before we start and even leading up to the session I feel a slight pang of apprehension building.  Once I am on the water it all goes away, which I am grateful for, and I can settle in and enjoy the feeling of cruising around the lake.  

During the morning sessions it is quite quiet, as we head out at 7:00 am, and the water traffic is basically us and any other paddlers or kayakers, with Mother Nature supplying any waves we might encounter.  Weekday nights are a different story, as we discovered.  There were lots of sailboats out, which were nice to see in the distance, and also a few people on sea-doos and power boats also enjoying the water and nice weather.  Needless to say the waves that were all around us were a bit stronger than the early morning ones!  

Both my son and I got up on our boards and proceeded to paddle and chat a bit, enjoying the night and marvelling at the waves we were encountering and managing to navigate.  I felt the sense of calm and peace that always comes during these sessions and wasn't terribly fussed by the active waters.  Instead I found myself just focusing on the moment and allowing the board and my body to do what they needed to in order to stay afloat.  I will credit the many hours of yoga training that I've completed for my sense of stability on the board, as my foundation is quite strong these days and I trust in my ability to remain grounded in my space.  However this sense of grounding was tested on the water.

We were paddling along when suddenly I felt a jolt that caused me to lose my footing briefly and then regain my stance and composure and stay afloat.  My eldest and I looked at each other in a bit of shock, as it had come out of nowhere.  "Waves are strong out here" he said and I agreed...but deep down I felt like there had been something else at play.  It did not feel like a wave had come and knocked my balance.  It felt like someone pushed me, almost like saying "hey, wake up and pay attention!"  

I feel like I lost presence for a moment.  I had been very aware of all that was going on prior to this taking place and then I allowed my mind to wander and I lost my focus.  In that moment, it was like the universe gave me a nudge to remind me that I was not there and that sense of being almost knocked off my feet was the result.  Despite the fact that that this took place in a moment and then was over, and that I didn't fall in the water or come to harm, this experience has had an impact on me.

What this has made me more aware of is how important presence is in remaining grounded in our lives, and how it feels to lose that base of stability.  How quickly and easily we can be toppled off of our foundation if we allow ourselves to lose our presence and how unstable it feels to not be in the moment.  I am grateful for that short and sweet lesson on the water as it is one that I will hold close, and in those times when it is all too easy to become tied up in future planning or past regretting I will stop, reset my footing and remember to be here now.