Choosing Love

 The other morning as I was sitting down to journal I pulled a card that stated "I Chose Love No Matter What".  I paused to take that sentiment in and to see where it was landing for me.  What I began to notice were all of the places where love could be woven into my life.

The first place I considered was in the relationships in my life.  Choosing love as a way to negotiate through the easy and more difficult seasons in a relationship is not always easy.  Love can be overlooked when we are on an upswing as we may be focusing on so many other emotions and feelings that are conjured up as part of our relationship highs.  When we are facing a downturn, we can often cast love aside and allow ourselves to be more focused on the darker emotions that may be present.  What would happen if we took some time to see where love fits into both of these scenarios - perhaps enhancing the upside even further and softening the downside a bit.  And also where love fits into the relationship that we have with ourselves.  This is a relationship that also can go through its cycles of ups and downs, and choosing to put love first in our inner dialogue may also help to sweeten and soften these moments.

I also considered love as an important part of personal boundaries.  I feel like I have been putting a lot of work into setting, communicating and holding boundaries as a way to show myself and others more love.  This may seem counter intuitive - how can setting boundaries show others more love?  When my boundaries are strong and coming from a place of love they allow me to be my most authentic and whole self because I am operating from a place of self-respect.  By giving myself the permission to have boundaries I am able to be more present and giving because I know that I will not run the risk of emptying my cup in order to fill someone else's up.  This work is not easy and I find myself taking a few steps forward and a few steps backwards on this.  That is okay.  Holding love for myself allows me to feel proud of the work that I am taking on and to not beat myself up for the times when I don't hold a boundary or struggle to be honest with my comfort around requests or expectations from others.

What if we looked at our overall goals and desires for ourselves and our lives through a lens of love?  Choosing to move towards that which will bring more love into our lives, allowing us to grow and thrive.  I find this idea lovely and a bit daunting at the same time. What if things I have had on my radar for a long time, to the point where I feel that they define me, don't actually bring love into my life?  What if choosing love means choosing to walk away from something that I have accepted as part of who I am?  For me, it has been baby steps here, slowly looking with a wider lens to take a full and honest look at myself and my life and to determine where I can add more love and where I need to shed old beliefs, habits and patterns that no longer serve me.  Little by little, as the old skin sheds and the new is uncovered I feel like a butterfly pushing to leave her cocoon.  Not quite ready to take flight quite yet, but pushing her way out to strengthen her wings for when the time is right.  Patience and love, understanding and trust.  These are the cornerstones that I plan on building the new year upon.

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